Stevie on route to Brooklyn. Photo by Donald Andrew Agarrat, 2005.
I said:
am opening up slowly. going over it all. see the cracks in you. cuts, scrapes, sores, bruises. not bothered by them. love them. dance with them. cracks in me. cuts, scrapes, sores, bruises. concerned about what you see. trying to not be. trying not to hide. concerned about 95mph. concerned about the molestation. wonders what to do, if anything, with that. so quick, so fast, so fast too quick, how to stop it, stop it, stop it. should/could/can I stop it? sometimes can't believe you chose me. didn't you see? so lonely, so afraid to let the inside spill out and be there for all to see. wasn't thinking you were coming. know why you did though. we supposed to be. we are. still freaks me out from time to time. this lifething. youthing. usthing. mething smiling. your face. eyes. naked. alive. am concentrated on me, on reduction. refuse to suffer from past. made a pact. everytime I get close fear fights back. knocks me down. get back up. insecurity refuses to leave. and I am telling you. it is not going. but it is. it is. leaving now. centipedes in my home. at work. swimming in your life. rivers of cum. learning how. benefits from your overachieving. loves lilies. hates to hurt you. take my hand. no answers. hold this. hold this.